I never usually talk about how I really feel but I just want to get this out.

About 4 years ago I lost my virginty to this guy.
I fell in love with him and I thought he loved me too.
For the last year we've been talking about seeing each other and I surprized him on March 22nd and I went and saw him. When I was over his house he held me and kissed me and told me he loved me and he aske me to have sex with him. I said yes and we did. After that he was still holding me,singing to me,telling me everything he felt for me and told me that he could now say he was taken. Words I wanted to hear for the last 4 years. Everything went fine until that weekend. He told me that he wanted nothing to do with me anymore. I don't know why! I feel so used and my heart is torn to pieces 'cuz I loved him for the last 4 years of my life and tried my best to be with him. I'm so afraid to love again. I'm gonna change so much that I don't have to think about him and his torture anymore. I just want to die right now. I've tried every and everything to keep my spirits up but I just can't. I loved the son of a bitch so much. If anyone reads this please give me some advice 'cuz the pain is so unbearable.
I wish I had one!!!